Chapter 40 ~ Past, Present, Future

Edward was in the shower so I left a note on the bed letting him know I was heading to Carlisle's office to give more blood. As I walked down the corridor I heard my name, I turned briskly to meet Jake's arrogant gaze. " What do you want dog?"

" Hostile much Bella? What's your deal?"

I quirked an eyebrow and pursed my lips, and I took a ' fuck off ' stance " Look Jake I think it best you keep your distance, I have issues with my temper, but out of respect I WILL leave your wounded body here for Edward to finish off."

" For real?" He was furrowing his brow, his smile wasn't so much a smile as it was a vacant emotional line, his face was telling a story almost.

" Yeah Jake, for real." I went to walk away but he grabbed my arm. It took everything in me to keep my cool. " release me Jacob or I swear to God I will fucking shred you!"

" Shred me fine, at least that way you will pay some attention to me for Christ sake!" He was ripping mad, I blamed the blind rage for his stupidity.

" Attention? Jake apparently I gave you way too much attention at one point, and in a haze of darkness when I was succumbed by my curse you took advantage of me, so you can stow the play with me play with me attitude."

He let go of my arm, but as he stood there with a hooded glare I felt his anguish, bitterness, and lust.

" You have no idea Bella what it's like to be near you, and not be able to love you."

" Fuck You Jake, if you loved me you would never do what you did!"

" What I DID! I know it's hard for you to get it through your fanatical mind Bella, but I did nothing to you that you didn't want or need."

My eyes widened in horror, " WANT? NEED? What do you know? NOTHING Jake you are a foolish child, I thought Edward was dead and you took what little I had and sucked it out of me."

" Yeah OK Bella, do me a favor tell me about that night?" He had his fists on his hips and a rage full look on his face. 

Truth was I couldn't tell him because I couldn't really remember, I just stared him down and after a few moments, a grin replaced the angering line of his lips, " You don't even fucking remember do you Bella?"

Every second I stood next to him the angrier I became, " I have to go Jake, Carlisle is waiting."

He shifted blocking my path, " He can wait, answer me!"

I released a frustrated breath, " Fine, No I don't remember, Edward told me, but before you go on and tell me to go fuck myself or deny anything you know what he told me was true!" I stated matter of fact.

He  dropped his head and shook it, " I never said I denied it, it was the greatest night of my life Bella, I would tattoo it to my face for the world to see if I knew it wouldn't shame you."

My heart skipped, he was so hurt, so unbelievably in pain. " Jake I ...." I literally had no idea what to say so I figured I would take the cowardly way out, " I'm sorry I can't remember, but I love Edward, you know this and honestly I'm just thinking about Mara and getting her back right now."

He simply nodded, " Yeah, well that's what I originally came here to talk to you about before you threatened me." He forced a smile, the pain was screaming at me. " It looks like we have located her whereabouts in the castle."

I knew I should address the Jake and me thing further but his words totally woke me up, " You found her? Is she Ok?"

He turned, " Follow me you can see for yourself." He started walking toward the ' War Room' as I like to call it. I wanted to stop off and let Edward know my plans changed but I was too anxious to see, so I followed Jake.

When we entered, Emmett, Rose, Esme and Carlisle were there and had their backs to the door and were facing the large screen." So we found her?" It was literally all I had. They collectively turned with determined faces. I looked to Esme who had a more harder look to her. It was odd I had not seen that particular expression on her before. I quickly walked to the screen staring at it. " Where?"

Rose Just pointed to a Pink light, " There, she hasn't moved all night." 

I turned to her, " All night? You found her and waited till now to tell me?"

She rolled her eyes, " I came by your room hours ago but... well you SOUNDED occupied so we just kept tabs on her till you were FINALLY decent." Her attitude pissed me off.

" Yeah well that's not OK when it comes to my daughter, you should have knocked!"

She crossed her arms over her chest and huffed, " Hell to the no Bella, I am mimicking you to pass as you in a NORMAL not NIGHTMARE induced daily lifestyle, I don't need to see that shit!"

Carlisle naturally intervened, " OK ladies, how about we catch Bella up on the evenings events outside her bedroom?"

I angrily rolled my eyes and face the good doctor as he began to tell me how an indicator light began flashing erratically followed by another and another. " It looked as though some sort of a fight broke out in the ballroom of the castle, as we watched we noticed in the midst of the chaos a single light, Moriana's fled the room and stalled in this area here." He pointed to a room on the map. " Then out of nowhere her light was accompanied by a pink one, as I watched further I realized it must be Mara's."

I was gaping, no doubt, " H-H How?"

He shook his head understanding, " You have a few lights here as indicators, colors mean something for you, well pink can be used to show childish innocence, or a characters child-like personality. It made perfect sense that it would be her." 

Of course it made total sense to me, that is exactly the color I would give Mara. " She's OK?"

Esme placed her hand on my shoulder and lightly she rubbed, " Yes dear, it looks like she is fine."

I nodded, " Alright this is good, maybe I can try and communicate with her?" I looked at everyone hoping I would get approval? I don't know, but it was Rose who spoke.

" Uh Yeah what the hell else would you do stare at the fucking light." She was such a bitch but i was grateful she at least answered me.

" OK can someone go get Edward he should be here for this." Esme shook her head and shuffled out the door. 

Emmett sat down and was just staring at me, I went and sat by him, sitting Indian style with my hands folded on my lap. Immediately Emmett mirrored me. I raised a brow at him, and he followed suit. " Really Emmett?"

" Really Emmett." was his response

" Oh no don't do that." I snapped

" Oh no don't do that." He said equally aggressive. 

I just put my head in my hands and sighed, only to hear HIS sigh in return.

Moments later Edward entered the room with Esme, I got up walked to him and hugged him, "Hey."

He was about to respond when Emmett began hugging Edward. Then Rose started laughing. 

Edward looked at me, then Emmett. " Uhm Hey Em, what the?"

I just shook Emmett off Edward, " He is trying to perfect me."

He smiled, " Well for Emmett, that could take forever." And that was all that was needed to shake Emmett out of his Bella routine.

" Yeah Fuck You man." He walked over to Rose and sat down, sulking.

Carlisle told Edward everything I already knew, " So Bella is going to try and communicate with Mara, and it is probably best you are here for this."

Edward shook his head, " Thanks." He turned he gaze to me, " You ready to do this?"

I shrugged, " It has to be done."

He smiled, " yeah, let's do this then."