Chapter 38 ~ Preparation

After everyone left to eat I sat in a chair just staring at the screen at all the indicator lights and the blueprints of the castle hung up next to it. Emily was there, I couldn't help her, why didn't I check up on them, what was I thinking, God could I have saved her?

" Bella?" I look up and Edward is watching me. His gaze is weary, so much sadness and terror in his eyes. Mara is his daughter and he didn't lose it like I did. Instead he held his shit together... for me, so I could fall apart.

" Oh Edward come here." I stand, opening my arms and he slowly reaches for me, grabs my wrist and pulls me into his arms. " We will get her back."

" I know Bella, I am so sorry about Emily." 

" I know," I grip him tighter, " I hope I don't fuck up."

He lifts my chin with his finger, " you are the strongest, most amazing woman I know, I doubt highly that you are even capable of failure."

I chuckle, " have you been drinking, no offense but it seems like all I do is fail, otherwise I wouldn't have fallen for Aro and Moriana's trickery, Jasper would still be alive, and Alice would be nothing but ash."

He just shakes his head leans in and kisses me with undying passion. Taking my hand I caress his cheek lightly digging my fingers into his jaw. When he stops he is glaring at me with love, lust, hope, everything.

" Bella, we have all been fooled, but you can only have the wool pulled over your eyes for so long, Aro knows this, eventually he knew you would put the pieces together, that we all would, he just never expected that you would become this strong, this fast."

" Oh Edward, if I am so strong why are you making me feel better when I should be the one making you feel better?"

"Because I love you, and loving you makes me the strongest man in the world."

I can't help but smile adoringly into the eyes of the greatest man I have ever known. " Maybe that's the key to it all then."

He smirks " enlighten me"

" Love, it's the key to it all."

" Oh we could only be so lucky." He leans in again and gripping the sides of my face kisses me deeply, reaching all the way into my broken soul, shaking it back to life filling it with light.

I light cough catches our attention turning we see Maggie smiling at us," Hey Maggie." I say slightly embarrassed

" Well hello you two love birds, so sorry to interrupt your.. err.. well whatever it was but the good doctor wants to start taking your blood, he thinks if we take a little at a time it will be safer for you."

I nod, " sounds good, thanks I will be right there."

" alrighty sweetie." She exits the room fairly quickly.

Edward and I return our attention to each other, " Ready?" he murmurs

" As ever." hand in hand we walk to the clinic. As we enter we notice the counters and wall dividers are all being moved ," What's going on in here?" I chime in all surprised

Carlisle looks up at me with narrowing eyes, " Well it looks like this plan of yours will bring in a whole lot of casualties or injured, so I will need room."

He is angry..... at me. " Look Carlise I know why you are upset with me."

He stands and stalks over to me rather abruptly, " Please Bella, don't."

I gasp at his massive attitude change, " Excuse me Doctor but you are out of line here."

" Am I Bella?" he looks down, shakes his head, he looks like he is trying to sort things out. " I love her so much, she has been through more in her lifetime than most of us, I don't want this for her."

Esme, ahh yes. " I know Carlise, she told me."

He looks at me, his stare is piercing, " Then why, how can you let her just go?"

" Because it's not my choice, but more so because the life she has now is no life at all." Feeling resigned to the fact that many people are likely mad at me I embrace my choices, and feel forced to be a soldier for Esme's. " Sitting in front of waiting pools, dropping flowers in them for a century, reliving a horror that only in our nightmares can we comprehend is not an existence." 

Carlise is just looking at me speechless, no sign of relenting, so I continue. 

" She blames herself Carlise, she is torturing herself, your love is a beautiful thing, but it's received by a shell of a woman that once was, her heart is dead, and if you want to restart it you need to let her have her closure."

Finally his eyes soften, he looks from me to Edward who is just holding me tightly, he has such pride in his face. " Let's get that blood drawn, Bella, come on." 

We don't talk anymore, Carlisle takes as much blood as he can without causing me harm. As we walk out of the clinic and down the corridor we realize we are being followed. I furrow my browse confused, I look at Edward, he has a hint of a smile on his face, no worry. We continue on our way and we hear footsteps, many more coming up to us. Again I look at Edward and he looks back at me and just shrugs. " Edward you hear that right?"

He just nods and suppresses a smile. " Edward what's going on?" Finally I stop walking and at the same moment all footsteps cease. I look around I don't see anyone, " Come on for real what is going on?"

" I believe we are being followed Bella." He says it like I should expect it.

" Well shouldn't we be worried?" 

He turns to me, " No."

And he just continues and as our speed picks up again so do the footsteps and as we turn a corner I push Edward to the wall and peer around where we were to see Seth, Rose, Emmett, and a few others coming our way, I jump out of them, " What the hell are you doing besides scaring the shit out of me?"

Rose simply folds her arms, " Well this is great, if we scare you how the fuck are you going to take on mommy dearest and daddy demented?"

Emmett lightly taps her arm, " Bells we are following you, to learn you."

And it hits me, of course I told them to learn my walk my gestures. " right." I look at Edward he is laughing silently. " And you couldn't just tell me this?"

" Oh come on Bella this was much more entertaining." He quips " Besides I thought it would take your mind off things."

I just shake my head, " Jerk." I say jokingly. He just shrugs, puts his hands in his pockets. I turn my attention to Rose, " Very well but I am going to take a shower now so do me a favor and DON'T follow me in there."

" Oh trust me this cause will only take me so far." She snaps back

I smile, " Good." I take Edward's hand and head to our room.